


I’m Not Okay

by RPGwrites



Series: V's World [1]
Category: Cyberpunk 2077 (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Queen of the Highway, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:22:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28211589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RPGwrites/pseuds/RPGwrites
Summary: When Panam asks V to join them, Panam have no idea how tempting the idea really was. But V had still to find a way to save her life. She'll go as long as possible not telling Panam that she's dying. But when she collapses she has no choice in the matter.
Relationships: Panam Palmer/Female V
Series: V's World [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2066628
Comments: 6
Kudos: 104





	I’m Not Okay

**Author's Note:**

> So, I finished the game yesterday and loved it! I have some fic ideas and this is one of them. I just had to write this yesterday and so I did. I hope you enjoy reading it. 
> 
> Please excuse any spelling and language errors I might've missed.

V and Panam were talking. She was asking them to join them. Panam had no idea how much V wanted to. 

She had no idea why, but Panam wanted her to leave everything behind her and be part of them. She was a corpo, so why the hell did she just want to leave NC behind and become a Nomad like Panam. 

Despite being a Corpo she and Panam got along well. When they met V thought they might have a difference of opinion but that’s not what happened. Instead V hung onto every word that came out of her. 

V started to explain to her that she couldn’t leave it all behind. At least not now. Words were still coming out of her mouth when her world stopped. Suddenly it spun and spun. V couldn’t see straight ahead of her. 

It felt like someone stabbed the base of her skull again and again. And with each passing second the pain grew worse and worse. Something warm was dripping along her skin. 

Her world began to move slower when Panam jumped onto the bar and next to the side and suddenly the world was upside down. All that V saw was darkness. 

* * *

Panam was worried. V was not doing okay. Far from it.

Here she was thinking V was in the prime of her health . But now? Now she was afraid of losing someone she considered a close friend. 

V went to hell and back for them. And suddenly she collapsed. 

Did Panam miss something? Was it in a conversation they had? Perhaps it was hidden away. Perhaps Panam never gave V the chance to speak. 

Or perhaps-

“Stop it.”

Mitch’s voice stopped her in her tracks. That is when she realized she must’ve started pacing. 

“Mitch. Is he still busy?”

“Yes.” He pointed towards the tent where the ripperdoc is. “You can go in and see her if you want.”

“Thank you.” 

Panam didn’t need to be told twice. She ran towards the tent hoping that somehow V would be awake. Chatting with the ripperdoc. 

But when she got there all that she was met with was disappointment. V layed there. Painful moans and groans escaped her mouth. 

When she caught herself she was staring at V wanted to help her somehow. Clearly she was in a lot of pain. Someone needed to do something dammit. They couldn’t just let her suffer like that. She didn’t deserve it. 

“How is she?” Panam grabbed a nearby chair and sat near the chair V was lying on. 

He sighed. “I’m afraid not good. But I can’t tell what’s wrong with her.”

“So it’s not her implants?”

“I’m afraid not.”

At that Panam felt disappointment. At least if it were her implants they would’ve been somewhere. But now they were next to nowhere. They didn’t know what the hell was wrong with V.

All hope was lost.

* * *

Everything hurt.

V tried to move. Just move a muscle dammit. But no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t. She was locked inside her own body. 

Her eyes didn’t want to work either, but when it did everything was blurry. Everything was out of focus. Everything was just wrong. 

The first thing she saw was Johnny just staring at her. She couldn’t even read his expression. Couldn’t see his face. 

Then she saw instruments. 

_ Ah. _ She realized. _ I must be at Vik’s. But how did I get here?  _

V frowned but that only made her head pounded more. Finally her muscles worked together and her hand moved towards her temple. She groaned as a pain passed through her. 

_ What the hell happened? _

She gave the room another look but realized Johnny was gone. She felt warm dripping on her skin and when she touched her nose realized it must be bleeding. 

With each blink the room turned darker and darker until all she was left was the darkness. 

* * *

“Saul says we have to move.”

By this time Panam was chewing her nails. She was filled with worryness. The ripperdoc didn’t even want to give V something since he didn’t know what was wrong with her. They were helpless. 

“We can”t!” Panam practically shouted her words towards Mitch. They couldn’t just leave her like this. “What about V?”

“Panam,” Mitch squeezed her shoulder, “I know you’re worried about her. But there’s nothing we can do for her.”

“Mitch I can’t just leave her.” Worryingly she looked at the tent V was in. 

“We won’t. We’ll take her with us, okay?”

Panam stared at him for a while. Thoughts of losing V reigned her mind. How could V do this to her? 

“Okay,” she nodded. “I’ll see where I can help.”

* * *

“Wh...Ah” Everything hurt. Just like last time but this time she could see a little better. Her head felt fuzzy but not as bad as last time. 

“Shit. V!” Someone said. She recognized that voice but where she couldn’t say. 

Something stopped and it took awhile for her to realize she must have been in a car. Where the hell is she? 

“V! Can you hear me?” The voice spoke again.

“I...what?” Although her head felt better it hurt too much to speak. 

Her vision got fuzzy again and a face came into her vision. It took her a moment to realize it was Panam. “V don’t you dare close your eyes on me again!”

_ Blink. Blink.  _

But with each blink she took longer. 

“V! Stay with me!”

Panam said something else but her voice drifted off. She saw lips moving but no sound came out. Finally she gave the sleep permission to take her away. 

* * *

“Why the hell did you stop?” Mitch said as he got to Panam’s side. 

“She woke up.” Panam was happy. This was great news right? This had to mean something good. 

“You think she’s getting better.” Mitch went to touch V’s head. 

“She was pretty out of it.” She frowned as she remembered their conversation. If it can even be called a conversation. 

Mitch grunted as he considered all of this. “Okay. Keep a close eye on her. We have to keep moving.”

“Gotcha.”

Panam got back into her car. The rest of the way she kept checking on V. All she heard was painful moans coming from her friend. 

She sighed as she desperately wished there was something she could do for her. 

* * *

Slowly but surely the world returned. Everything hurt just like all the other times V woke up. She grunted as she was hit with another wave of pain. 

She smelled fire and fresh air. If she was honest with herself she was no idea where she was. 

V remembered talking to Panam at the bar but the rest was very fuzzy. A ripperdoc. A car ride. But nothing else. 

“What’s going on?”

“V!” It wasn’t long until she saw Panam. “Please tell me you’re awake this time.” 

V gave another groan as she tried to sit up but that was a mistake. It felt like someone stabbed her head again and again. 

“Take it easy now,” Panam warned.

Panam looked really worried. But she also didn’t answer her question.

“What happened?” she repeated. “I remember… we were…”

“You collapsed.” Panam started pacing. She moved her hands to her lips. “V you had us all worried. What the hell is wrong with you?”

At the corner of her eye she saw Johnny, hands crossed across his chest. 

V buried her head in her hands. “It’s nothing. I’m fine.”

“Dammit V! You’re not fine.” Her hands were in the air now. “Collapsing? Blood? Something is wrong.” Panam took her seat again. “I thought we… just leave it.”

But V wanted to know. “What?”

“Dammit V. I don’t want to lose you. And then you pull that shit.”

“I’m fine.”

V stood up but as soon as she was on her feet she was on the ground again. “I…”

Panam was as quick as possible at her side. “You’re not okay.”

With Panam’s help she was on the bed again. V sighed. “You’re right. I’m not okay.”

“What’s up V?”

V hated the way Panam looked at her. It was bad news. Who was she to bring that kind of news to her? She didn’t want people to know she had another person in her head. That she was dying. 

V gave another sigh. “I can’t do this to you.”

“Hey, look at me. You’re not a burden okay?”

“Okay you want to know? I’m dying. My bio-chip. Someone’s engram’s on it. And it’s killing me.”

“You’re what?” The news was hard to swallow for Panam. 

“I don’t expect you to be there for me,” V choked. “I didn’t want you to know.”

“Hey, I’m glad I know.” Panam was looking at her. “I’ll never leave you.”

“I’m trying to find a way but so far…”

But Panam was already connecting the dots. “That’s why you needed Hellman.”

“Dead end. No hope.”

“Hey don’t give up hope. You have me by your side. Together we’ll find a way.”

“Thanks Panam.”

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to come and say hi on [ Tumblr ](https://rpgwrites.tumblr.com/).


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